True, embellished and fictional stories for your amusertainment

Best Legs

When my mom was 21 years old, she entered a beauty contest sponsored by Movieland Magazine – “Your Legs Can Be Your Fortune”. After her entry was received, a letter was sent to my dad confirming her registration. It was clear he had to approve her participation.

When the judging was complete, she received a Western Union telegram telling her she was their 7th place winner. In addition to flowers, her prizes included three pairs of Holeproof Hosiery plus one pair of Willys of Hollywood Hosiery valued at $5 per pair. Of course she would also appear in the magazine.

My mom – 7th Place Winner

I know that I could never win a best legs contest, but I’m sure my daughter could – her legs go on for days. Now if I could only get her to wake up.

She’s adopted

May the farce be with you!

Your IFF,

Pam

Goldilocks

Goldilocks discovered that three beers were just right

Family Photos

When my sister and I sorted through old family photos, I took custody of the majority of them. They’re fun to go through – recapturing old memories. There are shots you try to duplicate.

My sister’s on the right. I’m under the hair dryer.

The only thing that looks the same is the hair dryer.

There are shots that explain why you needed therapy.

That Santa is seriously scary looking.

Photos of people you don’t know.

Obviously, she doesn’t like having her picture taken.

And then there are shots that make you regret giving your sister all the pictures.

Beauty show contestant

She sang the song “Feelin’ Groovy”. As I recall, she was more animated in her performance than Simon and Garfunkel were in theirs.

Let this be a lesson Р you take a risk if you let someone else keep old photos. I would apologize to my sister, but she was forewarned.

May the farce be with you!

Your IFF,

Pam

Loaded Breakfast

My pancake was held up by a bacgun!

Cats vs. Dogs

This video illustrates the differences between cats and dogs perfectly. And it’s hilarious!

Barbucks

People came to Barbucks from all over the world even though the bucks’ lack of opposable thumbs made them terrible bartenders.

Just Turn It

My friend’s daughter decided to take up painting. To encourage her new endeavor, she gave her daughter several blank canvasses. A few weeks later, my friend noticed the canvasses were blank. When she asked about it, her daughter said they were portrait and she wanted landscape.

From portrait to landscape! It’s a miracle!

Although a true story, I found this tale hard to believe until something similar happened in my own family. Looking for a present for my mom, I found a picture of a zebra.

Zebra with a head

Unfortunately, the picture was too large to ship, so I texted a photo of it to Diana, my sister, to see if she could find the same item locally. My mom and Diana live in the same town so shipment is not an issue. Shortly after sending the text, I got a message from Diana saying she couldn’t find an exact match but she found a zebra picture without a head. This is what she sent.

Zebra without a head

A few minutes later, she texted again and said she was looking at it upside down. I’ll admit I made the same mistake, but it was a tiny image on my phone. Therefore, I place all responsibility with Diana.

Remember this. Everyone should get at least one turn.

May the farce be with you!

Your IFF,

Pam

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