Last week we were notified that Stephen’s term life insurance policy was about to expire. That led to a discussion regarding what we were going to do about it. Here’s an abbreviated version of the conversation.
Stephen: We should probably buy another policy, it’s just a matter of how much.
Me: Maybe we should save money and buy a smaller policy.
Stephen: Or we could go all out and get a million dollar policy.
Me: I think I want to wait until later for the million dollar policy. I still like you and I don’t want to waste money on a policy I don’t intend to use. Maybe I’ll consider a big policy later if you start getting on my nerves. That’ll give me time to figure out how to bump you off without getting caught.
Me: You know, my policy’s about to expire too. You might want to get a million dollar policy on me, down the road of course. You realize that it would be easier for you to collect than me. You’re the cook – you could slowly poison me and no one would be the wiser. You’d just have to be careful not to mix up the plates. That would be bad for you.
Me: I would want you to be careful. If you were planning to kill me I wouldn’t want you to get caught. That would be a total waste of a million dollars. It would make me happy knowing that you could live in luxury the rest of your life. So be careful, okay?
Me: Of course we don’t have to worry about that now since we still get along. I’m just saying for down the road it’s something to consider.
Looking back, it seems like it was a one-way conversation. Stephen was so uncharacteristically quiet I wasn’t even sure he was listening.
A few hours later Stephen hit his head. He seemed dazed so I asked him if he knew who I was. He said “you’re the policy holder.” Guess he was listening.
May the farce be with you!