True, embellished and fictional stories for your amusertainment

Fish Boil

Me: “Stephen, what’s on your neck?”

Stephen: “I’m not sure but it hurts.”

Me: “Let me see it. Oh my gosh! No wonder it hurts, it’s a huge fish boil!”


That’s not what this blog is about. It’s about my first fish boil – the experience of cooking fish in a big pot of boiling water and then eating it.

The process started with patrons gathering outside around a black pot boiling over an open flame, resembling a witch’s brew.

Fish's Brew

Fish’s Brew

As the crowd gathered, the Boil Master took center stage.

Earl, The Boilmaster

Earl, The Boil Master

He talked about the history and mechanics of the fish boil and told bad fish jokes:

Which fish go to heaven when they die?

What did the fish say when it swam into the wall?

At the end of the program, the Boil Master threw oil into the pot igniting the flames, indicating it was time to eat.

The flambeau fini

The flambeau fini

Everyone went inside and lined up to receive their food.

The feast included whitefish, small red potatoes, tiny white onions, coleslaw, bread and dessert. (Note: It’s customary to pour melted butter over the entire meal – sans the desert.)

Once seated, a server came to our table and deboned the fish. The only thing left was to remove the skin.

Although I have no recollection, I’m told that I expelled a number of disgusting sounds the entire time I removed the skin from my fish. I have no culinary skills, everyone knows it, yet I find myself in situations that require food preparation prior to eating. This time it was worth it.

Mmmm, I'll have a little fish with my butter

Mmmm, I’ll have a little fish with my butter

Surviving the skin removal, I was pleasantly surprised to find the meal delicious. Of course anything soaked in butter should taste good.

Barely room for dessert

Barely room for dessert

It truly was a wonderful evening. I’d even venture to say it would have been perfect if it hadn’t been for that nasty sore on Stephen’s neck.

May the farce be with you!

Your IFF,




Comments on: "Fish Boil" (4)

  1. Sounds exotic and dangerous. Down here in VA we just steam blue crabs in beer then throw them on a plate with corn and hush puppies. Of course we too then pour melted butter over the whole affair. Umm, summer.

    • I’ve never had anything like that but I would be willing to try. Even though we’re talking about sea bugs, the preparation sounds delicious.

  2. Sounds yummy – a Boil Master? (A fishy Bar-be-que chef!)
    Hey if someone else is in charge and doing the cooking, ( and there’s butter ) I’m there.
    Best in cool-ish weather?

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