True, embellished and fictional stories for your amusertainment

Posts tagged ‘friends’

Visit With Vivian 2018

I recently spent a week with Vivian, my friend of more than 30 years. Earlier this year she moved into a new house, so I went to help her with some of the finishing touches. I also went to meet her two new cats. I had already met the other three.

Vivian’s beautiful home has a finished, walk-out basement that she doesn’t use, so I had an entire floor to myself. Well, almost. I woke up to this every morning.

Honor and Handsome

Additionally, I had to share my bathroom.


Vivian thought of everything, including my private media center.

This was all mine!

However, I never used it because it seemed too difficult, what with three times as many remotes as devices.

Six remotes for a TV and a DVD player (which wasn’t plugged in).

One of the projects we worked on was assembling a lamp. Everything had to be put together, including the shade – otherwise how would it all fit in its tiny box?

The entire lamp was packed into this little box

Although most of our focus was on the house, Vivian’s car required a little work, too. A greasy cable was dangling from her door frame so she fixed it with duct tape.

Duct tape saved Vivian’s hair from a greasy cable

At the end of every busy day, we made time to enjoy the finer things in life.

Hilly forced us to relax

I was reminded during my visit how amazing it is that Vivian and I started out as friends and over time became family.

We’re like the mafia – in for life

May the farce be with you!

Your IFF,



Holiday Meal

When family and friends gather together, there’s usually a meal involved – especially around the holidays. Although I’m known for not cooking, I used to prepare an annual holiday feast for Stephen and I to share with a friend.

The first two years everything went off without a hitch.  Stephen prepped the turkey and placed it in a baking bag because I refused to touch the raw bird. However, I did everything else – baked the turkey and prepared the rest of the meal. The fragrant smell of home cooked food flooded the house, inspiring warm, happy feelings.

The third (and last) year was a disaster. When I put the turkey in the oven I accidentally set the temperature to 125. A few hours passed before we noticed there was no aroma coming from the kitchen. The problem was corrected and we eventually ate, but everyone accused me of trying to kill them with tainted meat.

Although I stopped cooking, other people choose to continue the tradition. A friend was dreading the work associated with preparing a meal for a large group of people. She decided that instead of cooking one 20 pound turkey, she’d make her chore easier by cooking two 10 pounders. Hmmm…

This holiday season I hope you’re surrounded by people you love with a belly that’s satiated with fully cooked food.

May the farce be with you!

Your IFF,


My real live bird in a bag

My real live bird in a bag


Splitting The Check

I enjoy visiting with friends I haven’t seen in a while – especially when the time we were separated melts away as soon as we’re together. This is exactly how it was when I reunited with a former work group.

Gathered at a restaurant, we talked for hours about our families, our lives today and reminisced about the past. While the entire evening was filled with laughter, hilarity ensued when the server brought the check.

We started with the most logical approach – splitting the bill six ways.

We each had the same total until someone pointed out that two people at the table didn’t drink anything stronger than water. As a result, the amount was recalculated for the nondrinkers and a new total was presented to the drinkers.

Of course, the process didn’t go as smoothly as I made it sound. Amidst the addition and subtraction were comments like “I don’t understand”, “That isn’t right” until someone said “Trust me – just do it”.

After muddling through, and checking to make sure we had the correct total and tip, we discovered the server had not only given us an overall bill, but she’d given us individual checks as well. As nice as that gesture was, we ignored it because we had already figured everything out the hard way. It was too late to go back.

Casual observers would have never suspected we were actually a group of intelligent women. Sometimes the obvious eludes us.

May the farce be with you!

Your IFF,


Good friends

Good friends

(Quite the contrast to splitting the check with Vivian.)

How To Tell When A Restaurant Is Too Dark

A few days ago, Stephen and I met some friends for dinner. We arrived about 10 minutes early. Our friends usually show up before us, so we asked the hostess if we could look around before being seated. Seeing no sign of our friends, we got a table and began to wait.

A few minutes after our scheduled meeting time, we started to wonder if our friends got lost. We were meeting at a new restaurant – one that none of us had been to before. I decided to text them.

Me: RU lost?

Them: Where RU?

Me: At the restaurant. Where RU?

Them: At the restaurant.

At that point, we started looking around and burst out laughing we saw each other two tables apart.

That’s how you can tell when a restaurant is too dark.

May the farce be with you!

Your IFF,


Stephen found a way to be sure he's seen

Stephen found a way to be sure he’s seen

%d bloggers like this: