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Posts tagged ‘Parrot’

Bird in a Bag

Parrots are easily bored. To keep their interest, it’s important to change their toys on a regular basis. When Amy, my parrot, wants something new she takes it out on everyone around her. She’ll scream – at the top of her lungs. In the summer when the windows are open, I’m often concerned that the neighbors will call the cops thinking someone’s being tortured in my house. Amy will also chew on things – she used to crawl down her cage and chew on walls, furniture, remote controls – anything that struck her fancy. We’ve since modified her cage to prevent her from walking around the room when her door’s open.

A couple of months ago we discovered the most wonderful thing to keep her occupied. She likes paper bags. We discovered this by accident when I put a paper bag from take-out on the top of her cage. She immediately looked inside and started making happy noises which sounded different inside the bag. She then went inside to chew her way out.

Amy in the bag

Amy in the bag

Over time we’ve learned that she only likes one type of bag – from Noodles and Company. Now when we go there, we show them pictures of Amy inside their bag in an effort to get an extra one. So far it’s worked every time. Even with the bags, she gets bored. It has to be changed every now and then so she can start fresh.

At the end of the blog, I’ve included a couple of videos of her playing in the bag. As you’ll see in the first video, sometimes we add a box for extra fun!

May the farce be with you!

Your IFF,

Pam

Spring Activities

Just because the weather’s getting nice, you won’t see me out riding a bicycle. The last time I rode my bike, turning was harrowing, I tipped over every time I stopped, and I flipped over completely when Stephen (who was out in front) stopped to check on me. When I was a kid, I could ride like the wind with no protective gear whatsoever. Now I need protective covering over my entire body just to sit on a bicycle.

It wasn’t always this way. Not that many years (okay, quite a few), Stephen and I would ride our bikes with no protective gear and only occasional injuries (me, yes, it was invariably me). We even made it a family affair. Stephen built a small trailer out of a dog crate and attached it to the back of his bike for our dog, Tony. Then he strapped a small, homemade cage on top of the dog trailer for our parrot Amy.

I have no idea why Stephen is dressed so formally for bike riding

I have no idea why Stephen is dressed so formally for bike riding

For the safety of everyone, the animals never trailed my bike – only Stephen’s. Amy loved the rides, reverting back to her first word “hello” for the duration of the outing. Tony was another story – he would have rather run along side us versus being trapped in a little cage.

These days, we take the dogs for walks – no protective gear needed. Amy stays indoors where she feels safer.

Hope you enjoy your Spring!

May the farce be with you!

Your IFF,

Pam

Size Doesn’t Matter

My household is filled with birds and dogs. The alpha is Amy, our blue-front Amazon parrot. She’s been part of the family for nearly 30 years. Initially she started out as a dog substitute but quickly created a spot all her own, one that can never be replaced.

Our first dog was an Italian Greyhound named Tony. Weighing in at 12 pounds, he was accustomed to being around birds and not eating them. The perfect fit. From the get-go, Tony knew that Amy was top-dog. Even though she was much smaller than him, he would never look her in the eye and usually kept his distance. Regularly, Amy would assert her position by climbing down her cage and chasing Tony across the room. She knew he was afraid of her and enjoyed reminding him of their hierarchy.

Years later, we still have Italian Greyhounds and the parrot continues to reign supreme. Recently, when giving Amy a shower, we captured footage of her unique relationship with our dog Dewey. Just as the dogs before him, Dewey clearly knows his place.

May the farce be with you!

Your IFF,

Pam

Fowl Language

One of my friends adopted a pre-owned cockatiel. With cockatiels at home, she wasn’t in the market for another bird.

Shopping in a pet store one day, she felt something pelting her head and looked up to see a cockatiel throwing seed to get her attention. As soon as they made eye contact, he said “Take me home, I’ll be a good boy.” She took him on the spot.

The little bird was full of surprises. When one of his companions laid an egg, he repeatedly shouted “I’m not the father.”

I share my home with a parrot who will most likely outlive me. Once she starts saying something, she’ll continue to say it for the rest of her life. That being said, the rule in my house is “no foul language around the fowl”.

A divorcing couple from North Carolina probably wish, in hindsight, that they had paid more attention to what they said in front of their bird. According to her new owner, Peaches the cockatoo re-enacts arguments from her previous owners. Take a look.

 

May the farce be with you!

Your IFF,

Pam

Aye, Aye Captain

International sensation “Talk Like A Pirate Day” is Friday, September 19. By now you’ve probably got a pirate name, outfit and know how to talk like a pirate. If not, go here – fast – because there isn’t much time.

With the basics safely under control, it’s time to make yourself stand out. This wonderful holiday only comes once a year, so make the best of it and gather unusual props.

Pirate Props To Make A Statement

1. Carry a parrot on your shoulder all day. Make sure it’s wings are clipped and it doesn’t eat your ear.

Think of her beak as a very sharp, strong can opener on the end of her face

Think of her beak as a very sharp, strong can opener on the end of her face

 

2. Combine International Pirate Day with Bring Your Dog To Work Day. It’s okay if you don’t work in an office, just bring your Pirate Dog with you where ever you go. Be sure he/she has a pirate name.

 

Dewey The Destroyer

Dewey The Destroyer

3.  Find a cohort to dress up with you. Make them call you Captain and do your bidding. Better yet, find a dog and human wearing matching pirate costumes.

 

Scurvy Stephen with Mia the Merciless and Dewey the Destroyer

Scurvy Stephen with Mia the Merciless and Dewey the Destroyer

4. Make an Aye Aye your companion. Be sure to name him Captain. If you’re unfamiliar with the Aye Aye, check out Ze Frank’s hilarious short video “True Facts About the Aye Aye”.

Happy National Talk Like A Pirate Day!

May the F-Arrr-ce be with ye, Mateys!

Your IFF,

Poopdeck Pam

Holiday Letter 2013

Dear Family & Friends –

This has been a remarkable year.

In July, an asteroid destroyed our home.  Luckily no one was hurt and we were able to move into our basement.  Sifting through the rubble, we recovered a large tarp to use as a roof. We still have power because one of our gracious neighbors allowed us to run an extension cord from his home.

The dogs have been hunting local wildlife so we can put food on the floor (our table was destroyed with the house).  We learned the hard way that we couldn’t do the hunting ourselves.  Stephen had to spend three nights in jail for killing rabbits. On the bright side he had a bed and indoor plumbing during his incarceration.

Amy (our parrot) is also pulling her weight.  Now that we’re saving money to rebuild our home (we have to pay the bulk of the cost because we had elected NOT to get the extra asteroid insurance – who would have guessed?), we’re sending our correspondence via parrot currier.  Amy’s a little slower than USPS but much more reliable.  The only problem is that she gets bogged down with heavy packages.

Every day we marvel at the generosity of others.  Once the temperatures hit -10 degrees, a neighbor gave us a sleeping bag and a child’s Tyco playhouse.  Stephen and I take turns wrapping up in the sleeping bag.  The one inside sleeps on top of the other to provide added warmth. Our pets use the playhouse as a shelter to keep warm.

We also discovered that old garbage gives off heat – you just have to be willing to put up with the smell.  Our neighbors have been helping there too, by dumping their garbage in our basement. So thoughtful.

We’re hoping for a lot of snow this winter because it’s an excellent source of water.  When we want to melt it quickly, we set a bucket (also supplied by a neighbor – bless them all) under another neighbor’s dryer vent and it works like a charm.

The challenges we’ve faced this year have certainly changed our outlook on life and made us appreciate the generosity of others. Life is not only full of surprises but also full of blessings.

Here’s wishing you a very happy holiday season.

===========================================

May the farce be with you!

Your IFF,

Pam

Dewey hunting squirrels

Dewey hunting squirrels

Big Dang Theory

Did you know that swearing can reduce pain? I mean when you swear not when someone swears at you.

Researchers have learned that swearing, unlike other types of speech, uses brain circuitry that’s linked to emotion.

Normal language comes from the outer layers of the brain’s left hemisphere whereas expletives are buried deep inside the right half. Swearing engages the amygdala which triggers the fight-or-flight response and increases heart rate. This in turn results in decreased sensitivity to pain.

I suffer from migraines and profanity is one treatment I’ve never tried so I decided to give it a chance.

Because I live with a parrot, initially I cursed under my breath as I didn’t want Amy to hear me. Whispering was totally ineffective.

Alternatively, it didn’t seem to make sense to say the words at a normal tone – no value in wasting good profanity – so I clamored my curses.

In response, Amy reacted more to my volume than my words. She loves the sound of my voice. With each new malediction, Amy barked back at the top of her lungs.

In short bursts, I highly doubted she would learn to call me an a**hole in the presence of strangers.

Our exchange continued for only a few minutes before I decided that cursing would not cure my ills. Frankly, I’m glad to have stopped because I need time to find a dead mole to bind to my head – another treatment I’ve yet to try.

All in all it was a good experiment but I swear Amy’s calling me a bastard.

May the farce be with you!

Your IFF,

Pam

No foul language around the fowl

Use caution when spouting foul language around the fowl

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